On this day 3 years ago... I SAID YES! 💍

2020 has been a really crazy year. From unexpected deaths to a world pandemic. Then most recently the largest world protest against racism and police brutality. And then on a personal level, my husband and I have also been struggling with infertility. It has been a lot to process and take in. To put it lightly, this year has been a real test of our faith. But one thing I have learned to do in times of uncertainty when my faith is a little shaky is, look back at all the blessings and miracles God has already allowed to happen in my life. It’s a reminder of how good God is and how he always has a plan. So today I want to share the greatest blessing God has ever given me, my husband Ken, and the day he asked me to be his wife. Now although this story is about him getting down on one knee and proposing, I can’t tell this story without first providing some background info to paint a more accurate picture of how it all went down.

It all started a couple weeks before my 29th birthday. At the time we were in a long-distance relationship living 12 hours apart. He was in Dover, Delaware and I was living right outside of Chicago. We flew back and forth to see each other almost every month. So for my birthday, we were planning for him to come visit and celebrate with me and my friends and family. Oh, and on each visit before this birthday trip, he had surprised me with really sweet unexpected gifts. For Valentine's Day, he had given me rose gold earrings and necklace set. And then on another occasion, he gave me some rose gold sunglasses. He told me these were hints to a bigger surprise down the road. As you can see he knows my love for surprises and he was purposely allowing the suspense to build for months. 😩👀 Surprises are definitely my love language.

For my birthday I was not aware of any plans on his part besides him coming in town to visit. So I had decided that I wanted to do a cooking class with him and all of my friends on my actual birthday. I also had to shoot an entire wedding immediately following the cooking class (I don’t know who told me that was a good idea 🙃). The cooking class was so much fun. 10 of us prepared a Mexican Fiesta while sipping wine and margaritas and listening to my favorite playlist. It was definitely a good time and the food ended up being really good! Unfortunately, immediately after the class, I had to rush off to shoot my wedding. So I spend the next 8 hours on my feet photographing a wedding (again I do not recommend this for any other photographers out there). The wedding went awesome. I on the other hand was so worn out I could barely stand up afterward.

As soon as I am done working, Ken picks me up and takes me back home. I am so exhausted all I can think about is sleep. But as soon as I start getting ready for bed Ken comes out of nowhere with a camera in hand, telling me he still needs to give me my birthday gift. I am so exhausted I almost asked him to give it to me in the morning. But I could see how excited he was so I oblige and open the card he handed me. The card was nice, of course, but when I opened it there was a piece of folded up paper inside. When I unfolded it, I realized that it was a boarding pass. If you travel a lot like me, you know that you can only print boarding passes within 24 hours of the flight. This boarding pass was for a flight to Jamaica in just 6 hours. I was so excited and shocked that all of the exhaustion literally disappeared. After thanking him with a million hugs and kisses, I went to my room to frantically pack my suitcase. I don’t think either of us got more than 2 hrs of sleep before we were up and heading to the airport. Those few hours were such a blur of excitement and exhaustion but completely worth it.

When we arrive in Jamaica (after a super nerve-racking ride over in a shuttle who clearly wasn't aware of what a speed limit is) we are greeted at the resort with beautiful views and tropical drinks. We were then escorted to our beautiful room with a balcony. Immediately after dropping our bags in the room, I decided that our first stop had to be the beach. When I am on vacation I live on the beach and pool. I basically spend every waking moment I can near water. Jamaica is absolutely beautiful. This was one of the best vacations I have ever had. We literally had the time of our lives. We ate great food, hiked up a waterfall, and went swimming with the dolphins. But the most memorable part of the vacation is actually a surprise photoshoot. Before the trip, Ken reached out to a local photographer to plan a photo shoot in the rain forest. So when he told me about the shoot I immediately assumed he was going to propose. I mean honestly, this is the perfect scenario. The dream proposal for a photographer. We were on vacation for my birthday on a gorgeous island with a photographer. Oh and I forgot to mention that my grandfather accidentally let it slip that Ken had asked him for my hand in marriage a few weeks before (guys I was so sad because I thought the surprise was ruined 😩). So when he told me about the photoshoot, I was convinced that it was going to be a proposal.

As I started getting ready for our shoot my stomach felt like their were bats flying around in there. I remember I was texting my friend Natalie asking her what she thought of my makeup and outfit choice. I wanted to make sure I looked good for my engagement photos (yes I was that convinced guys 😂). Together we decided that I should wear my favorite colorful dress that complimented the navy blue Ken was planning on wearing. The shoot was set to happen in the rainforest but we decided to take a few photos at the resort on the beach before we left. Immediately after the local photographer picked us up. We took a long drive to what I could only assume was the perfect spot for his proposal. The entire drive I remember that I kept checking his pockets for a ring box-sized bulge. When I didn’t see one, I assumed the ring had to be in his backpack. When we arrived at the rainforest we jumped right into taking photos. The entire time, my heart was racing anticipating when he would do it. So we finally get to the end of the shoot and sit down on a bench. Ken starts looking right into my eyes and holding my hand, so I just knew this was the moment. He says, ‘Are you sure you want to marry me?’ I take a deep breath and say yes as I wait for him to get on one knee and pull out the ring. But that was it. That is all he said. We just kept taking pictures and eventually got up to walk back to the car to drive back to the resort. The entire ride back to the resort, I was super confused at what had just happened. By the time we got back to the resort, my confusion had become a full-blown attitude. I remember sitting at the bar just pissed off. Finally, Ken asks me what was wrong. At this point, I'm sure he thought I was crazy. This man had surprised me with a trip to Jamaica for my birthday. We had been having such a good time and just finished a photo shoot in the rainforest but somehow I was sitting at the bar with a whole attitude. Finally, I burst into tears and explained that I thought he was proposing to me earlier and that I had an attitude because I was disappointed and embarrassed. He looked at me and apologized for the misunderstanding. Then I of coarse had to apologize for my attitude. I decided to let it go and enjoy the last day of our vacation. I realized that I needed to stop assuming when, where, and how he would ask and just enjoy the moment.

Now here is where the story gets good. 😂 So we fly back to Chicago on Thursday. Ken told me his flight home was on Saturday, the same day as my sister Cinque's high school graduation. So on Friday, we found out Kindrid Family Soul was playing at a local bar and decided to make the best of his last night in town (sidenote: I love Kindrid Family Soul). It ended up being a lot of fun. The next morning we woke up and got ready for my sister's graduation, while Ken packed up his things to head home. My mom out of the blue volunteered to drop everyone off at their destinations. She claimed there was something was wrong with the 2nd car. So we left the house and head to the airport first. I quickly say my goodbyes to Ken, then we head to my sister's graduation. It was a great day. We watched her walk across the stage, followed by dinner with our family. And as much as I enjoyed celebrating Cinque, after traveling, working, and hanging out with Ken I was exhausted. After dinner, we head to my dad's house, where I thought we were waiting for my mom to come to pick us up. But after an hour my dad volunteers to take us home. And then my stepmom, sister Cinque, and brother Czar say they are coming as well. This was a little weird, but again I was dead tired so I was just happy to be on my way home to get in my bed.

We pull up to our house and everyone gets out of the car, which was another weird thing. Why is everyone be getting out to come in and hang out at our house after we just spent all day together? I, again, brushed it off. We walk into the house and all of a sudden I hear my friends and family yell surprise. I look around confused and wonder who they are talking to. My birthday was 6 days ago. I had already celebrated with my friends and family AND went on a vacation to Jamaica. I didn’t understand why we were still celebrating ME. Especially on the day my boyfriend had just flown back home. Why now? But the exhaustion did not let me think too much into it. So I just happily greeted everyone and enjoyed their company.

About an hour after we got there my mom all of sudden tells me she needs me to go outside so she can give me my gift. Being the ray of sunshine that I always am when I am tired, 🙃 I protest this request. I did not understand why I needed to go outside to get a gift when she could just give it to me right where I was comfortably sitting. My protest was no match for my black momma. She pulled the ‘I am your mother card’ in that tone of voice that makes even grown black children’s heart start to race. So I reluctantly got up and went to the backyard where I was asked to sit down and was blindfolded. So at this point in the story, you can probably guess what happened next. And I should have known too with all the hints. But I can honestly say at that moment I was completely clueless. I remember jokingly asking my mom had she gotten me a car. I also remember a lot of whispering while I sat there not being able to see, for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, after at least 10 mins of waiting, I feel a hand reach out and help me stand up. I assumed it was my mom. But when my blindfold was removed and I saw it was Ken with a huge smile on his face. I was shocked and confused yet again. He started saying words but I was in such a daze I couldn't comprehend what he was saying (luckily everyone was recording it).

Guys, I still had no idea what was happening until I looked down and saw the box in his hand. That's when everything started making sense. That's why my mom volunteered to drop Ken off at the airport and drive us to the graduation. So that she could swing back around and pick Ken up at the airport. That’s why she was insistent that I go outside for my gift. So that everyone could see what was happening. And lastly, that's why Ken didn’t propose in Jamaica in what seemed like the perfect scenario. He was planning an even better surprise that included the people I love the most.

So that's how Ken asked me to marry him. I always said I wanted to have one of those proposal stories that I can tell my kids about. And with all the twists and turns and surprises, I can not wait to tell our future kids. This story is truly a testament to how intentional and thoughtful Ken is. He is truly the best gift God has ever given me. After all the mistakes I have made in my life sometimes, I still can’t believe God would bless me with such an awesome partner. There is no one I would rather do life with than him. ❤️